Warning: this post diverges from my usually positive offerings.
Yesterday I set out to write a massively joyful post about Dowser 7’s great release – biggest release day ever, great store rankings, fun live release day party. I wanted to thank my amazing and supportive readers. And to tell you how blessed I am to have you all in my life.
Then I got blindsided.
Tagged. On Facebook. By a reader who just had to let me know how lacklustre she thought my new book was – less than 24 hours after its release. A reader who’s name I recognized. A reader who I’d had positive, fun interactions with previously. She decided that the first thing I should see the morning after I’d released a new book – the accumulation of months and months of my life – was just how bored she was with my newest effort.
Of course, I answered her politely, as is my default. And I shook it off. Not everyone likes every book (I certainly don’t). And I’ve had people be nasty to me before, though usually in a private message.
I went to work. I spend my entire morning boxing up giveaways. Hundreds of dollars of giveaways. Happily. Because I do love to give things away.
Then a couple of hours later another reader decided to comment here on my blog, expressing his disappointment in the book. He was rather detailed, including informing me (the lowly writer) that my FEMALE character had learned her greatest lesson from an OLDER MALE character and that she should just stick with that. I imagined I was supposed to reply with gushing gratitude. What with me being a FEMALE writer and him being MALE, he was totally in his rights to tell me – in my personal space – everything I could be doing better. Right?
Nope.
Fortunately the comments are moderated on this blog aka my personal space. So, yeah, I deleted that message. And then went on with my day.
I must, must mention that positive after positive message was also filtering in through all of this – lovely reviews, lovely readers who seemed to understand and appreciate the tenor of the new book and what it was setting up.
But, of course, I’m exhausted.
I’m empty.
Drained.
I just didn’t realize just how tired I am. So the nasty messages are what stuck to me (as they do to any of us). And by the end of the day I just shut down. Far, far down. As in needing to be in a dark room with my head pressed against the wall with Michael trying desperately to figure out was wrong and how to fix it.
And, after he coaxed me out of the dark and got some food in me, we made a plan. A plan that has me working less, and buffering myself from nasty people more. And that is sad. It is sad that because a few people are nasty, I have to pull back on all my relationships, that I have to pull back on my level of commitment to keeping up those relationships.
But, eager to keep moving ever forward, I started my new routine this morning – namely, half days rather than full days, on Saturdays. Yes, I’ve been working six, often seven days a week, for over three years now. No vacations that last longer than two days, and I had only one of those in 2017. But this morning was a new day, a new plan. I headed out and got my driver’s license renewed – only 3 months after it had expired – and I helped Michael with errands instead of working like I usually do.
Because if I’m balanced, I shouldn’t be so thin skinned, right? I shouldn’t allow myself to get so empty that someone can make me cry after a great release day because she tags me on Facebook just to make certain that I read and understand her opinion.
Anyway.
Moving forward.
I did errands this morning. I bought myself some new seeds. I reminded myself that there is life away from the writing.
After I made my hot chocolate, I happily wandered back into the office, ready to box up the last of the giveaways (I had to buy padded envelopes to do so).
And in my inbox sits an email. Another male reader. This time complaining about the preorder giveaway.
Now – unfortunately – readers do like to complain about my giveaways.
Yes.
People complain about how I GIVE things away.
This has happened in some form or another many times. Usually it has to do with shipping – over which, as I’m sure you understand, I have no control. Occasionally, I also apparently make giveaways ‘too difficult’ to enter.
But the reader who felt compelled to email me this morning informed me that I’d disappointed him – funny how men always seem to need to express their utter disappointment in me when giving me a scolding. He was disappointed because I hadn’t given him enough time to enter the preorder giveaway. Yes, the giveaway announced on my blog over a month ago, then mentioned weekly (sometimes more) on Facebook/Twitter/Instagram/Google Plus, then mentioned in my monthly newsletter on January 2. That giveaway.
Apparently, I needed to make a bigger effort so that he’d had more time to enter.
So …
I’m starting a Shit List. Yep. For the first time in my long writing career, I’ve been pushed too far. Three straws in less than twenty-four hours have dented my resolve to be perpetually positive. I opened a Word document and I wrote three names in it. It’s titled: shit list and saved to my desk top.
And now I’m writing this blog post, publicly admitting that I’m tired of being treated badly by people who just expect me to suck it up.
So here it is, for everyone to see and understand, if you are nasty to my face in my space – my inbox, this blog, or any of my personal social media pages – I’m putting you on my shit list.
Because no.
Just no.
You can’t be nasty to me and expect to enter and win giveaways. I might have always adhered to the random number generator in the past. I might be Canadian. I might love to laugh. But I just cannot do it any longer. I cannot be quiet about rude, inappropriate behaviour. I cannot reward nastiness.
Be nasty about me or my books in your own space, in your reviews. That is your business, and your right to your own opinion.
I will not be mentioning this again. I don’t want to mention it ever again. But try to make me cry? To make me feel like I’m worthless? I’m putting you on the shit list.
And now I will post this, then happily go back to addressing giveaway packages.
Oh! There are new T-shirt designs coming. That’s fun. And Dowser 7 paperback giveaway, of course. I just ordered copies.
Good for you! We all have our ‘just no’ points. You are dealing with yours extremely well. Hugs from Ireland.
It usually takes me a long, long time to hit a ‘no’ point. I’m always moderating myself, telling myself to not be so dramatic. But this time I’m done. And I don’t feel guilty about it at all. Which is good.
Well said. Get that stuff off your heart. You are a good writer. You are stronger than the shit people throw. You have my unending support and a virtual hug. Do what you need to do to move positively forward.
Thank you! I usually don’t dwell on reviews and such. I feel like my job is to write the book the best way I can, and a reader’s job is to read it and decide whether or not they like it. That is totally cool. It’s not cool to be nasty to my face. Well, not anymore at least.
You shouldn’t feel guilty at all. You have a wonderful talent and most of us are glad you share it with us. Separating the negative from the positive is a great to remember that you have more supporters than detractors.
I left out “way”. A great way!
Oh Meghan, so sorry this has happened & at what should have been a really feel good time. Been really busy org jazz evening so had to ration myself to just first few pages & already hooked. Easy to say but it’s their problem not your’s. As someone once said ‘if you can’t say anything nice don’t say anything at al’. Ignore them & carry on being your lovely self and eating lots of chocolate (but not too much 😉 ) xxx
Agreed. Moderation. In work and in chocolate. But not too much moderation … LOL!!!
Meghan. I am so so sorry that petty little people did that to you. I love your books. All of them. I love your openness and your giving spirit. Rise above those monsters. And find some balance. Rest
I love the writing. I’m rather obsessed about it actually. There is nothing I would rather be doing. I’m blessed to be making a living writing but I would do it either way. And with all the good comes bad, but I’m going to deal with it differently from now on. Nicely, of course. LOL But in a way that keeps me distanced from it (balanced, like you say).
Huge hugs and evil glares at the haters.
I just love your books and your kind spirit. I’m so sorry you’ve had to deal with all that.
I am stunned at the insensitivity and rudeness that you had to endure when you should have been riding the wave of your sucess.
I think your solution is a brilliant way to deal with the negativity..
Take more time for yourself, smell the flowers and enjoy the ride!!
Good for you. People sometimes feel such entitlement, and ownership of others. Good to push back and remind them otherwise and reclaim your space!
You are an amazing writer, don’t let those horrible people and their horrible comments take that away from you. 💗
I loved it – excited for the next instalments..
A shit list is the way forward. I may start one too. 😘
Eat chocolate, cupcakes and be happy 😊
I love your giveaways – you are very generous x
I’m with you – I loved the book and am eagerly awaiting the next 2 books!! Any giveaways are always amazing – no writer has to give things away, I’m honoured when you decide to do that!
Meghan, hold you head high, go eat chocolate with Michael and just chill. There will always be haters but you are better than them xo
I don’t blame you. There are differences between constructive criticism and just plain nastiness… Someone trying to make you feel like crap because they think they are entitled to share whatever nasty statement they have brewing inside. I have not been able to sit down and read my preordered copy yet, but am looking forward to starting it today. Everyone should have a shit list because you may not be able to look at someone and exactly say what you did was shit and what you left me with was shit, so guess what a shit list comes in handy. Remember while you are an author and readers are your goal there are some readers out there that want the same thing every time even to the detriment of how you see the story line progressing and that is not constructive criticism that is an entitled reader demanding not true character growth, but hating change. You can’t please everyone with what you create, oh the bane of being an artist in any form. If it’s any consolation I am sure there are plenty of us that you are in our top 10 list. I love your novels.
It breaks my heart and saddens me so that there’s such nasty evil people in this world that cannot appreciate the commitment and love you have for your writing, stories and characters which you so selflessly share with us. Horrible bullies. Work – life balance feels like it’s always an unachievable dream but keep strong and strive to eat more chocolate, tend to your hobbies & other passions (including Michael).
Jenna x
WTH is wrong with people? How selfish and rude!! You are an amazing person and writer! How do I know? I don’t obsess over books and authors that are nasty humans! I certainly don’t wear their merch, continue to read their books, and suggest them to anyone who will listen! We flock to you and the worlds you create like moths to a flame. You are our bright light and anyone that tries to dim it not only deserves your shit list…but our wrath!! You absolutely need days off! Treat yourself right girl! We are here for you! Now eat some chocolate…take a long walk and a good bath! You can’t feed people from a garden that hasn’t been nurtured! 💙💙💙💙💙💙
Very well said!
Thank you Amy for saying so eloquently what is in my heart. Meghan, you are an amazing writer and I love your books. Character growth is part of the story, and I appreciate how your characters change and grow over time. Won’t get to Dowser 7 until next weekend for personal reasons, but I am really looking forward to it. Hugs!!!
Hooray for you! I’m sorry people are jerks. I’m glad you’re drawing a line in your personal spaces, though. And I hate how the bad sticks more readily than the good.
I am sorry that “self absorbed earth revolves around me only” people have pushed you to this point…its been refreshing that you, a busy author, take the time to reach out to your audience and let us enter your little section of the world…you share your space and time…and your turn around time on your stories have been incredible. Thank you for all you do from answering fb comments…hell just reading our comments…and your give aways are fun and personal…you live in another country mail takes time…thank you and enjoy your time walk away from the negative….
Meghan, you are an extremely talented and put 100 pct effort into your books and merchandise. You are a perfectionist as am I which means you pour your heart and soul into whatever you do whether it’s writing or making delicious cupcakes. I have found during my lifetime (I’m 54) that there are some people who will never be pleased no matter how hard you try. If these people miss a giveaway etc. they will blame everyone but themselves thinking they will get what they want just because they can scream the loudest. The sooner you accept the fact these angry and selfish people will never be pleased the less they will affect you. The majority of my life I worked in customer service. I dealt daily with stock and commodities brokers as well as their clients….talk about some hot headed people lol. Don’t let them affect you girlfriend it’s their problem not yours.
I completely agree. Normally I try to talk myself out of being hasty but I think this is a pretty easy line to draw and enforce.
Well, shit. Why do people think that’s it’s ok to be mean to others. Because, frankly that’s what it boils down to. And why on earth would people expect you to write the same kind of book all the time.
One of the best things about this particular novel was the time you spent setting us all up for the next. This story was about adding new characters and it was done in a great manner.
Now I’m really really sorry I missed your launch party – I was working – but I should have let it play out while I was working.
Meghan you put do much extra effort into your fans. You talk to us. You know us. I wonder if those three on your shit list have even a modicum of understanding as to how much time you put in. FOR US!
Do you know what makes you one of my favorite authors? You.
So from someone, among so many, that does appreciate you, your time and your stories … thank you.
Some people just have to be lousy to others. Just remember, karma is a bitch.
I can’t believe how outrageous people can be. I’ve got all of your books on my phone. I preordered Dowser 7 but haven’t read it yet because I decided to start rereading from the beginning. I love your writing!
I’m sorry for the mean people. You’ve worked hard to create this world we can visit when we read your books. I know I’m thankful for everything you do.
Hugs
I am so sorry that idiots have darkened such a bright time in your life. Thank you for sharing your gifts!
I’m glad you’re standing up for yourself. Jerks exist, and we end up dealing with their shit. So sorry for their stupidity; and i say stupidity because I can’t conceive of any other reason for their actions, though I suppose plain selfish meanness might be part of it. There are many more of us who love and admire you and your writing. ((hugs))
I am so sorry Meghan! I just love unsolicited, spiteful feedback. Why people feel the need to constantly express their negative opinions is beyond me. People can be such jerks. I appreciate all of your heart and soul that you put into your amazing stories. I am so thankful that you share them with us. I am glad that you started your shit list and hope this doesn’t discourage you in maintaining the positive relationships you have with your loyal fans. And hey, if you are looking for an “enforcer” I can make some time. I have some skills 🙂
LOL. So far I haven’t needed a personal enforcer but if I do I’ll come to you first!!
Wow. Just wow. I haven’t finished the book yet (trying to savor 😉), but so far, so good! You just do you… and leave the rest of us to sort ourselves out! The good guys will win out in the end. 😄
Just to say I love all your books and the only thing that disappoints me is I read them too quickly!! You have a beautiful way of weaving your stories and make me become part of them when I read them. This is precious as it offers me respite from my work. Being a psychotherapist, I need to change my mindset and focus on magic and chocolate now and again. Thank you for your hard work and remember that people who judge are usually very unhappy beings. Don’t let them steal your light 🙂
I haven’t read the new book yet, but I can’t begin to imagine it wouldn’t be as great as all the others have been! We all look for validation from those we share our art with and expect that not everyone will love the work as much as we do after putting all the hours and sweat equity in it. But to be faced with ugly and nasty comments is, even though all are entitled to an opinion, just a show of their crass immaturity and lack of plain manners which they should have been taught at an early age. You’ve handled yourself well in this unfortunate situation and even though it’s hard to let it go — don’t let it ruin the amazing world you’ve created and the people who can’t wait for the next book to come out. You have more than a lot of us who love the stories, characters and the fantastic imagination it takes to create all of this!
I’m sorry to hear people are treating you with so little common decency. If it helps, I loved the new book and was only mad it didn’t keeping going. I hope that’s the extent of the crappy people.
Hi Meghan, I am so sorry about this. I am sorry that people feel compelled to tell you how entitled they feel to your work. It is one thing to be constructive about what you didn’t like about a book, or any creation, but to tear into it and someone else like that is far beyond me, especially to their face. I want you to know that you have given me, and many others, such a wonderful, beautiful world that we can fully immerse ourselves. I’m a huge reader. I’ve easily read thousands of books in my time of reading since I was a child, and I have not had such an experience with a book series as I have with this one. I have gotten immersed in other books before, loved other series before, and they’re in my top favorite books. But your book universe is something altogether. You take the time, pouring your heart and soul into everything. You create characters that are real and relatable even though they have magic. You take the time to create even more stories with your other trilogies that aren’t the Dowser but part of the adept world. I don’t know how many times I wished other authors would do such a thing. You also talk to your fans as if they are your friends, and I think that’s a beautiful, magical experience in itself. I don’t know how anyone could even feel like they could be nasty to you.
As for the people who do that about the giveaways. I’m an incredibly busy person, and even I had the time to see that you have written us many many times, more than you should, more than you needed (and I appreciate it, I’m not getting nasty, I’m going somewhere with this) so the fact that they think you needed to do it even more for them specifically because they missed their chance is all on them. I’ve had other authors do giveaways before, and they don’t spend the amount of time and effort you do with them. Heck, I won an author giveaway going on three or so years ago and never got anything. But you’re always kind and wonderful with everything. Plus, shipping isn’t cheap and you do big big giveaways. I just don’t understand people. It makes me so saddened to see people have treated you this way, but it also makes me angry.
Getting to my final point, and I’m sorry this is so long, but I’m happy you’ve started the Shit List. You don’t need people bringing you down in this way. I’m also so happy you have Michael. That’s wonderful he works with you like that. I’m so happy you found each other. It’s ridiculous that people feel it is okay to just go to someone and attack them that way. I hope you feel better, and please take the time you need. I appreciate everything you do for all of your readers so much. It’s a great experience reading the books and doing online launch parties. But please take care of yourself as well. Sending you lots of love and light this day and always. 💚
❤️❤️❤️
Meghan, I’m so very proud of you!! You are a Strong TALENTED, Caring human being!! No one who shares so much with so many deserves to be treated so poorly. Keep your poop list going! But also keep a list of the thousands of us you make so very happy. Pay attention to us. Write their name on the list and then try not to give them another thought…..they aren’t worthy of your time, emotions or you giving them more than a nano second of thought
Agreed!! You are the ones who truly count! And I’m blessed to have you. And I don’t even expect you to like every book! LOL
But the majority of us LOVE every one of you books….old and new! Never stop being the wonderful YOU
I’m so sorry this happened. I agree that they can have their opinion, but why tell you? That’s just mean spirited. I am enjoying reading your book and my only complain is that my kids and my husband keep interrupting my reading. In the past, I didn’t read urban fantasy books, but after reading the 1st Dowser, I’ve been hooked. You are a great writer and don’t let negative people ruin your good nature.
Don’t feel bad about taking care of yourself, it’s self preservation, we all need it! We will be here anxiously awaiting for your books, posts, and anything you send our way.
OMGosh … I’m not under the delusion that everyone is going to absolutely adore your writing, every time you release something new … but SERIOUSLY, to come into YOUR space and throw down insults, or even worse, to childishly “tag” you on social media, to ensure your attention, and then spew your disappointment for the public’s viewing … I’m with YOU, it’s definitely time that a *LIST* is created. I haven’t finished your newest release yet (I’m fighting a cold and recovering from shoulder surgery), and I’m thinking I’m going to go back and start from the beginning, I think I’ve missed too much in my cold med/pain/muscle relaxers induced state … I want to be clear headed … 😍😉 … I LOVE ALL of the Dowser/Oracle/Reconstructionist series … remember, “Those who mind, don’t matter. Those who matter, don’t mind “.
That is a perfect saying. I’m adding it to the top of the shit list!!
I am so sorry anyone thought they had the right to treat you this way. You are incredibly talented, generous and kind. You interact with your fans in such an open and honest manner, that it truly pains me that someone (or several someones) saw this as an invitation to attack you. I am glad you are taking steps to prevent that type of behavior. Going forward, know the majority of your fans love and respected you and your work and support your need to have a balanced life. I’m 2 chapters in and enjoying the new book very much!!
Meghan I can’t believe you have to go through this. So many of us love your writing. I will wear your T-shirt’s proudly and will continue to tell everyone about your awesome books. Don’t let it get you down. Unless you need an excuse for chocolate. Wait what am I saying……you never need an excuse for chocolate!
Take care and enjoy the good reviews and try to ignore the bad BS. Not like they are offering good advice anyway!
I haven’t gotten your new book yet but I plan to and I am sure I will love it as much as I have every other one. I own a small business. as well as I am a teacher, a reviewer and every once in a while someone will be shitt** about my product. I just chalk it up to jelousy, what are they doing suree as heck not spending every moment they have doing something creative and working all the time. So just know there are a lot of us out here and we absolutely love your books As for your give aways, I have won a couple, haven’t won and missed deadlines to enter oh well that’s life and tell them to grow a pair. OK sorry maybe not so appropriate but yeah I get upset when small people try to make people feel bad. You are amazing and everyone knows it.
I’m so sorry people treated you that way. You are an awesome writer and we are extremely lucky that you take time out of your schedule to interact with us and provide giveaways. I loved the book and look forward to any future books you write.
Lots of love and hugs! And good for you to stand up to people being rude! That us my one pet peeves. I can’t stand rude mean people. Life is too short and beautiful to worry or stress about some hateful person’s perspective or opinions. And just so you know, your books are wonderful escapes that I totally look forward too. So thank you for creating and writing about these wonderful characters and thier adventurous lives!
Bloody hell, some folks just need a brain colonic!!
What gives them the right to do this to you, a person who slogs over writing a fantastic book/series, I’ve just started the new book and I’d give it 100 thumbs up if not more already 😉
Please know I adore this series, and from the look of the rest of the comments those fu#ktards are on their own………probably in a darken room somewhere.
As for the comps, I understand that you’re in the US and some comps just can’t be internationally as the cost to yourself would be horrendous. How would they like to PAY p & p if they won? No, then STFU!
I hope you never have to add more to the Shit List, but I’ve a feeling as some humans are just total muppets, you’ll have to 🙁
I now suggest you grab Michael some chocolate and relax >:)
I live in a homeowners association and have been president for several years. It is an unpaid position. I am constantly amazed at how some of the owners seem to think I work for them and they feel free to call me at 7:00 AM to complain about a pile of grass the gardener left in the road. One guy even asked when my office hours were so he could come complain. I keep telling people to call the management company, but nobody listens. Needless to say I have a blocking feature on my phone and I block them. You are right it seems to be MEN who feel they are entitled to be rude to women. Ignore them, block them and enjoy a good glass of wine. They are retards.
Crazy!
Meghan, my father had a saying, “illigitimi non carborundum.” Don’t let the bastards get you down. I love your books and always look forward to new ones. However, if I have to wait longer between books, so be it, if it means that you are taking time for you. Vacation sounds good!
Good for you! Your books are awesome. Your characters are strong and I love reading about their adventures. That said, I’m glad you are taking more time for yourself. Enjoy it!
Meghan, I am so sorry that you had such a terrible experience on what should have been a celebration. Hopefully reading all the replies to your post shows you what your readers think about you and your writing. We love your writing, your interactions with us, your personality and your enthusiasm. You are a ray of sunshine. Don’t let their mean spirits cause you anymore hurt. I think Michael is a hero to all of us and you are lucky to have found each other. I glad you are going to take more time to experience other things. You work very hard and deserve only happiness. Now, I need to get back to rereading Dowser 7. It was delicious, better than chocolate! Jade is amazing! But then, so are you!
I really hate this for you Meghan. I think you are an amazing, generous person. I love all of the books you have written, and I have never seen another author have so many giveaways for fans. Thank you for all that you do!
Am very sorry that you’ve had to deal with “people” like this. I swear the older I get the more entitled and rude folks seem. Thanks goodness for the real things that matter, a great partner, family, a rewarding career and chocolate!
I’m an ex-Navy gal, a little old now, but still have a few tricks up my sleeves. Will be happy to help Kendall with any enforcer duties that may be needed, I need the exercise XD
Hugs <3
You are a wonderful and very generous person (not to mention a fantastic writer). Theres no need for negativity if your life, just keep doing what makes you happy!
*Jenn stands up and applauds with true enthusiasm, wishing she were wearing an orange t-shirt that says I do bite!”*
Yay for you Meghan. You go girl, you ROCK. I don’t believe in criticism either. I’ve told all my loved ones that I don’t take criticism on my artwork. If you want to tell me you love it, great, if not, silence is golden. Elizabeth Gilbert who wrote “eat, pray, love” and “big magic” has a great treatise on criticism. I wish I had a link to send you, it’s brilliant.
You don’t deserve what you got, not even a little bit. Even if you actually DID write something truly trash, which seems impossible to even envision, you still wouldn’t deserve what you had to weather. How is it that these people don’t see the difference between review and criticism. Maybe they’re not cooked right, other than that, I got nuthin’. I’ll never understand it and I can’t ignore it because that kind of criticism hurts too much.
I hope you can use all the positive comments and the above like a salve. Just know, it’s not you, it’s them. You rock. They deserve your shit list. ;o)
BTW, hope you’re not drowning like we are here in Nanaimo. Either that, or I hope you like rain, like me. Hey, you can let that rain wash those peoples’ criticism right into the ocean and out of your life.
It just started really raining a couple of hours ago. It’s supposed to dump over night but we hope to get in a hike tomorrow afternoon. Fingers crossed! And thanks for all the other words of support. ❤️
It amazes me how people can be so hateful, mean and just plain rude. I have only just started D7. So far I love it I know I am one of many. Good for you for standing up for yourself and I am so sorry to hear that people are trying to tear you down. As for the give aways I am shocked at how rude people are about them. Thank you for the time and effort you put into your books and your readers. I hope you have a great rest of your weekend.
Maybe you could start a second “Shining list” those that appreciate you. Look at that when your short list of nasty individuals gets you down. Let the positive lead the way.
It always dismays me when people react negatively publicly to a book. Who forced them to keep reading. Do what the rest of us do. Stop. Delete or donate. Move on to the next one.
Too many sad, angry people hide behind computers and spew poison. Things they would Never say in a face to face conversation. Even sadder when they are loud jumping up and down “see me, see me” on someone else’s day.
Good for you saying “No, you are not allowed to treat me like that”
I loved seeing your energy and enthusiasm on Thursday. Go back and put that memory in front of the rest. Take Care.
You are all on my shining list. Every day!!
I hope you can tell by these replies that you have far more people who appreciate you — and the amazing stories and universe you have created for all of us to play in — than people who feel entitled to hand you their crap to carry. And you have every right to say no to being their handmaiden.
And as much as we all love your stories, none of us want them at the cost of you — so please feel free to take more than half a Saturday to charge and refresh. I hear Friday afternoons and Monday mornings are delightful as well. 😊😜💕
Ha, ha. Love it. I was better at taking time off in Vancouver. Going for a walk on the seawall or out for dinner. Michael and I made a pact to be better about it, even if we have to make more effort on the island.
It is harder to do than it sounds, I get it! With a big project at work and no kids at home any longer, I have to work at taking time off. I have started knitting in the evenings … on a loom and loving it. I wonder where I got inspired to knit… 🤔
😊 I do love my knitting time! 😊
Meghan I’m sorry you face this but am sadly not surprised. Everyone feels like their two cents is worth 50 these days. You have every right to shut them down and I’m glad to hear you’ve made a positive plan to move forward that includes more you time. I for one love every minute of Jade’s existence and look forward to more. Much love from Australia 🇦🇺
Sal xo
(((HUGS))). THANKS FOR EVERYTHING YOU HAVE SHARED WITH US! AND FOR THE WONDERFUL WORLD OF ADEPTS!
I am so sorry that you have had to deal with the haters of the world. I wish those three were the only ones…Unfortunately, it seems the world is mass producing them. Bravo for taking steps to protect your soul. Please know that we are not all like that. Some of us love your books and your chasracters…they are now like my family, as are you. Thank you for opening yourself up to us. Your fans, and being accessible to us. I don’t know any other author that does social media as you. Haters are always going to hate…don’t let them ruin your heart. Thank you for just being you…
First off (((HUGS))) to you. Secondly shame on them! Your books are wonderful and I should know I have read every single book of yours. There is nothing wrong with the way you do giveaways;it’s fair and we always have plenty of time to enter. For those 3 people who had to be degragatory you have hundreds of thousand of readers who adore YOU and YOUR WRITING!
Some people just can’t take their lousy attitude or disappointment or whatever and move on. They feel the need to grind their axe with the people they feel are the root of their angst. Good for you for saying “not in my house”.
Oh Meghan!
People are harsh because they are inadequate, not you.
I would read any of your books (and many other authors) because I like your subject matter, your special characters, and your great ability to write a great, pull me along, keep me on the edge of my seat, rolling with laughter and tears. Your books leave me satisfied and craving more.
I do not read review typically because I like what I like and I don’t care what others think.
Having said all of that please, hug yourself for me and believe in your stories! I say this because I want more! As much as you can create!
Thanks for all of your work!
Sue
You are probably the most generous author I’ve ever known of. You go way beyond what anyone else does. You go out of your way and ship us books that are signed. Which I apprecite so much. Don’t let the few buttheads who can’t handle strong women get you down. You are a gifted and caring person. Keep your light shining. And I love the idea of a shit list.
Good for you!! I am thoroughly enjoying the fruits of your labor but also understand how you can key that one nasty comment shape your day. Just do not allow some asshats to define you. There are so many of us who love and appreciate your work. Take a vacation and take care of yourself!!!
I don’t know why, but it never fails to amaze me how very rude and awful people can be. I’m so sorry that a few bad apples took some of the joy out of your release. Personally, I think you’re an amazing author and truly lovely person for sharing part of yourself with us. Thank you so very much for all that you do!
I loved your book. I am glad you are distancing yourself from the negativity. Life is just too short. I have been meditating for a few months and it seems to be really helping me focus on trying to not let others “empty my bucket.” Balance is definitely key. So I send you positive thoughts and to let you know that I appreciate you.
I actually need to mediate very evening so I can get some sleep. And most days it actually works! 😂 Well, my version of meditation.
I agree! Meditating at night totally relaxes me and clears my mind of all the “nuttiness” of the day. I just have to make sure I don’t do it too early in the evening. Lol! 😉
I do it in bed on my ‘spoonk’ for thirty minutes, then I try to fall to sleep.
I understand your feeling of being tired and drained, of the dark space from which someone has to coax you out. I’m not a writer. I’m a teacher – English and reading; junior high, high school, and college all in the course of a day. Negative feedback seems to be the norm, and there are times I am hurt by what is said either to me or about me. I tend to carry the attitude of “I’ve been called worse by better.” When the days are long and hard, I have an escape. I crawl into a world not of my making. I crawl deeply and lovingly into the world you created. I devour your books and am bittersweet when they end because I know I must wait before another comes out. Yes, I have other worlds I enter, as well; but I read the first book in the Dowser series, and soon I had ordered and read all of them. As in all of the related series, too. Like you, I have males who feel the necessity to tell me what I do incorrectly or they could do better. I’m a feminist. Why yes, I did purchase a pussy hat. Raspberry pink, thank you for asking. I’m assuming you would have. 😎 The reality is, as women we have fought long and hard to write and read about strong female characters. Yours have learned from other strong female characters. A lesson from a male is small potatoes in the series. It is a world bursting with females who are smart, savvy, supportive, strong, sensitive, and sassy. Keep it up. Your world is where I crawl when my world is dark.
And yes, I. preordered. Unfortunately, the 19th was the end of the quarter and semester. My brain is fried. I am overwhelmed with grading. But once grades are submitted at the high school and college, I’m jonesing for Dowser 7. I. Can’t. Wait. And their opinions don’t mean shit to me. I form my own.
Stay strong. Find that balance. Know that your efforts are appreciated.
Cheryl Wyatt
I knit my pussy hat. And one for a girlfriend (who is also a writer) as well. 😊❤️😊 I’m so, so glad my books offer you a little bit of respite. I go to my fav authors for that as well. I have also been called much, much worse by people who professed to love me in the same sentence. Normally I shake it off easier. But like you said, being tired doesn’t help with resilience. No matter! Moving forward now with a new attitude. 😊
I’m so sorry you were hurt. Your books are wonderful. You are sweet & generous. The blogs, recipes, & beautiful instagram pix are absolutely loving & lovely. Please don’t let inferior humans bring you down. If you email me, I’ll send my phone number & you can call me when you’re down. Or send an address & I’ll send you chocolate. Thank you for the adventures. Xo
Thank you, thank you! It was a rough day, and an ‘almost breaking’ point. A good lesson for myself, I think. By Monday I’ll be happily ensconced in writing Dowser 8.
Meghan, There are far more of us that love your work than those few that decided to be inappropriate, and I’m sorry that they brought you down on your shining day. I LOVED the new book so much that I cruised through it and am starting it again to be sure I didn’t miss anything. Lol. I also wanted to say that your involvement in our lives: eg. the release day party and answering all of us all the time like a trusted friend, means so much. I think it’s great! I think we all get to the point that we make a shit list in our lives and I’m sorry you had to. On the other hand, Thanks for taking those bad weeds out of our chances of winning great prizes 😉 Sorry this is so long, but I want you to know that you, your books and your feelings are loved <3
Ha! Ha! That is the bright side! Less competition! Love it. And you are correct about everything else. I hear you. Thank you.
Meghan, you are amazing and a badass with more talent and depth for spinning stories and creating worlds that captivate people then most of the population. I know how easy it is to let the negative sneak in and take root rather than the good and happy. But you are a great and wonderful person with a husband that loves you dearly and a fulfilling passion that you graciously share with others. I hope after a new plan and a refreshing outing with Michael, you are able to reset, rest and recharge. Shake off the haters and I hope the shit list stays short. But girl, you are amazing. Keep on shinning your light and optimism.
❤️❤️ Digging back into Dowser 8 will make me happy as well. I get edgy when I’m away from the writing too long. ❤️ Thank you for helping keep me in the light.
How dare anyone make you feel like that!!!! How dare they!!!! Your books and the world you have created for me and many other people to escape into, is amazing. You are extremely giving as a writer, I love your blog posts, how you let us into your own life here, on instagram and fb and let us see that little bit of you, taking the time to interact with us your readers, I love it that you are such a creative person you’d crafts, baking and of course your amazing writing. Please never let the very few ruin anything for you, I hate you’ve been made to feel like this, take care of you, sending you lots and lots of love, eat some good chocolate, and ignore anyone who doesn’t recognise your brilliance xxx
I started reading the new book last night. I love it. Mean people suck. THEY’RE the ones with a problem, not you!
I’m so sorry that readers felt they had the right to treat you that way. Criticism is one thing, and certainly it’s something that all writers must face and learn to deal with. But being nasty is totally uncalled for and the complaint about the Giveaway, well all I can say is, I wouldn’t give him a prize even if he was the only entrant and thus the only possible winner. Sounds like an ungrateful brat anyhow!!!! I really enjoyed your new book. It had a bit of a different feel to it, like all the characters needed things to ease up a bit, take it easy and not face constant world changing battles. And it sounds like you need that type of rest. Maybe you subconsciously wrote the book that way b/c you physically and mentally needed to ease up on yourself too! I hope you are able to enjoy yourself and get adequate rest now (have you heard of float pools? They are supposed to be awesome for this!). And please schedule a few holidays, even if they are just weekends. It gives you something to look forward to. We all love your books but we love you too and will happily wait a little longer for your books if it means you are healthier.
Oh, Meghan. Sending lots of good energy and positive vibes your way. It’s easy to say that we shouldn’t and won’t let crap like this bother us, but it can, and does, and it’s a hard hard hard trick to just let it go. Out of your head, out of your heart. It’s EASY for some to complain and criticize. And, people are 97% more likely to state a complaint that offer a compliment. (truth) So for each complaint, know that there are so many more that are in love with your work and accept it, and enjoy it for what it is – a gift. One that you have chosen to share with all of us. It’s not that we want to appear that we are taking advantage of your generous spirit, but hopefully you are aware that your work is enjoyed and you give so many so much. Joy, Laughter, Sorrow – all things that quite often we need to stifle in our day to day lives (for one reason or another – Life happens) are always expressed when reading your books. I can sob uncontrollably, or laugh outrageously (in public no less) and feel strong or silly. Your books give me a freedom that I can’t always find elsewhere.
As to those unappreciative A**holes that have no manners? I’ve always been of the mind that – if I don’t like a song that’s playing, I change the station. It’s not the songs fault – I’m just not in the mood for it. Television, movies, same thing. I’ve read books I don’t care for. Do I tell the author? Nope. I give it a chance, and if it’s not connecting with me, I put it down and find another. You cannot be all things to all people.
Sigh. I have a blog, with @ 3500 followers. I’ve gotten some fairly nasty messages. They don’t like something I post, or write, or an opinion I have. I tell them that rather that striking out at me, the solution is simple. Unfollow. I would rather have 10 respectful followers than people that are willing to be inconsiderate and disrespectful. Let’s be honest. There are people in the world who ENJOY being mean, or cruel, or just plain not nice.
Find your balance (as I know you will) and don’t let the bastards get ya down. You’re awesome. Totally.
I am so sorry you feel like this. I enjoyed the book and feel (hope) it is setting the scene for many more to come. Try to remember that the negativity says more about them than you.
I love your books. Hell, I can’t even write a meaningful message in a birthday card, so I’m impressed with writers. Thanks for entertaining me and keeping me sane with my version of therapy and relaxation.
The internet trolls are always Johnny-on-the-spot to offer their ego bolstering opinions to tear someone down. I loved every book in every series you you have written. It is hard to write. Let’s see something they have published. My mother always told me “If you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all( wished she herself had subscribed to that motto). So having lots of nice to say about your writing, I eagerly await your next book. P.S. I just left a 5 star review on Amazon.
My mother use to say that all the time … with the same results as you got from your mother. Ha. Thank you so much for reading, reviewing, and commenting here!!
I’m so sorry!!! 🙁 The internet has given too many people the opportunity to be RUDE without accountability!! None of those people would have said those things to your face. I LOVE YOUR WORK. Please don’t let these nasties hurt you. You DESERVE balance in your life as all of us do. PLEASE take time to nurture yourself. As a daughter of an artist, I know my mom did her best work when you had her soul nourished with her hummingbirds, garden and good food. Her paintings would reflect this glow… Have a happy weekend. Looking forward to reading the new book.
Yeah! Go girl! I’d have been crying my eyes out for days! You stick it to them!
Rude people are everywhere. Please don’t let them get you down. Take the breaks as needed. We will still be here.
Omg. I understand that people have there opinions but sheesh. I haven’t finished it yet Bec I was trying to take my time. I just hate rude people. Just say you didn’t like it and keep it moving. I personally like all your books. I may disagree whay the way you wrote something but that’s Bec I wanted it to go my way lol and I always feel lime I know these people. Ignore the haters. “Haters gonna hate”
Meghan:
First I want to say how much I have enjoyed your books over the years. Thank you for sharing part of your world with me. It may have had its ups and downs and even some sideways, but I have always hung around for the adventure and have not been disappointed in the end.
Secondly, well dealing with the public always has its good and bad. We sell a particular item on eBay that is completely manufactured by hand by my husband. We have done this for a lot of years now. Generally we have fund it to be fun and enjoyable, and even allowed us to have a bit more disposable income. However, I do have a file labeled “assholes” just for those very special folks you get to deal with. They will never know that they have made it into that file, but it gives me great satisfaction to click on that file and then stick my tongue out and yell “na na na na, now who’s the bitch!”. It’s also wonderful that I can block them and never have to deal with their issues again. So, keep your shit list, I’ll keep my asshole file, and we can both keep our Mona Lisa smiles and let them all try to figure out what we have been up to!
Meghan,
I enjoyed the book very much. If I had a complaint, It would be that it was too quick a read. Don’t let the critics get to you. I have never written a book and probably never will. If it were easy, everybody would do it. Screw em, the book was a fun read and nothing will stop me from buying your next one.
Tim
“If I had a complaint, It would be that it was too quick a read.”
What I meant is that if the book were 1000 pages, I would have enjoyed it just as much. Have you ever thought on writing a 1200 page book? I would buy it.
Tim
It’s my screenwriting background that keeps the books around 79-95k. But since I tend to write in trilogys all together the books add up to a heftier tome. 😊
Oh boy Meghan, after reading what that man said. Hell no, you don’t have the right to be that way. I’m sorry it happened to sweet lady, but I love the shit 💩list. You go girl.👍👍👍👍👍
Sorry “He” don’t have the right
Three cretins, hundreds of happy reader who LOVE what you do so a Big thank you x
What?? Your not going to spend every moment of every day tethered to your computer, giving me more Dowser wonderfulness??? HOW RUDE!!! Where is Henry with those handcuffs of his?😁 You rock, don’t let anyone make you feel otherwise!
I was so excited about your new book, that I waited up until midnight, downloaded it, and stayed up all night reading. It was excellent!! Anyone that says otherwise is an idiot!!! (I need more exclamations?) I’ve now read it twice more, and have read all of your other books multiple times. I can’t wait for the next ones to come out. I love the shit list idea, it will keep you from rewarding the thoughtless trolls and turds out there. However, on a serious note… you need to pamper yourself a bit so you don’t burn yourself out. Please take care of yourself, and maybe slow down some. I’d miss your writing way too much if something happened to you.
Don’t worry. I can’t not write. I’d go a little crazy if I didn’t write. But yes, I’m pulling back on all the other nonwriting things I do. 😊 So glad you liked the book!!
Hi Meghan, I must say I look forward to each of your books and have never been disappointed. Each one just takes me right into the story. I can see, feel, smell and hear what you are writing! You have such a great way of describing every detail that I feel like I am there. There are always people who are out to make others feel bad for whatever reasons but you bring much happiness to so many when we read your books that it drowns them out! Keep writing and we will happily keep reading 🙂 Thank You for being such an awesome author!!!!
💗💗💗
I know from personal experience that it is easier said than done, but Don’t let the opinion of a few morons EVER make you feel bad about your work, or about you as a person! I got hooked on your books since reading the first one, and I will never stop reading the stories you create! Hold your head high, you are amazing!
Life is too short. Congratulations on telling the “entitled” people of the world that it is not your job to the keep reminding them to enter a giveaway, that’s what calendars are for. You write great books. In all my years of editing and writing for corporate America the only criticism allowed is constructive criticism. Continue what you been doing but take the weeklong vacations, special nights out and do the fun things life has to offer.
❤️
Focus on the positive- I love your work and eagerly await each new book- I am in awe of anyone who is able to put such an amazing imagination down on paper and make their thoughts into a fabulous story that keeps me riveted from start to finish. Thank you for your gifts x
💗 Thank you for reading. 💗